Another story from my freshman year at school. It's something I grabbed off my myspace, so it's gonna sound like a younger me wrote it.
Jinx: Yo, niggas is flippin over these refund checks.Roommate: Shit yea bwoy (This means 'boy' in his language)! I'm gonna be ballin!
[SIDEBAR. For all you readers, just to clear things up. Having the left over money from your loans ain't ballin. It just means your spending the money that you were lent and your gonna have to pay it back, and your gonna be pissed that you spent it on Frito-lays & fitted caps instead of holding on to it.]
Me: Oh word? You gonna be stuntin on these fools right?
Roommate: Of course Bwoy. Im A Balla! Unh!
Me: (looks off to the side at the computer... thinking.. This will probably be worthy of a roommate convo)
Roommate: Damn I'ma have so much money. Remember when you was little and your friend would ask you if you'd do something for a million dollars?
Me: Something crazy, like eat a bug? Or like jump off the top of the playground equipment?
Roommate: Na, like act gay.
Me: (squints) Um... na, I didn't run in those kind of circles...
Roommate: You know... your friend would be like "Aye Man, would you be gay for $100?
Me: Um, I hope you said no.
Roommate: Of course I Said No! I ain't stupid bwoy...
Me: (Thinks.... Na, that's to easy...)
Roommate: It'd have to be way more money .....Like $500...Wait No....$5000!
Me: Oh. Aight (This is where I make an attempt to stop the convo early)
Roommate: Well I would need however much to buy a flat screen. And a porno.... And a hooker.
Me: What?! ..wait wait.. nevermind.
Roommate: Have her like, "Oh yea," and I'ma be watchin the porno and drinkin a beer and have her right next to me. If you know what I mean bwoy.
Me: Stop callin me fucking "Bwoy." And you gonna need enough for the beer too right?
Roommate: Yea you right. I'ma need some for the beer & a pizza.
Me: Pizza?
Roommate: Yea I thought I'd get me a pizza too.
Me: (Just stares at roommate)
